I got the job. The pay was incredible. Now what. I could not mess this up. Full time job, opportunities to grow, learn and build a better life for myself and my family. I cannot ruin this. I had two weeks to my start day. I studied day and night.
I asked questions constantly. I paid to learn how to use Jira. I was having a tough time grasping Jira. But giving up was not an option. I prayed all day and all night. I counted down the days and finally the day arrived. I met with so many people on my first day that I could not keep up with names or titles. I knew I just had to be polite and respectful. I took notes. I was filled with anxiety. I was certain that there was no way they could not tell that I was anxious. Thankfully, the expectations the first week was to observe another Scrum master. I found out that not a lot of people get that opportunity. Boy, was I grateful. I observed like my life depended on it. Unfortunately, everyone was so busy that there was no time to meet with people aside from the group meetings we had. I could not really ask a lot of questions or get guidance. However, I sent emails and messages asking for links and information that I could read relating to the company, the project and the people I would be connecting with. With two teams and a total of 21
people, I struggled with remembering names. Very challenging if you are the Scrum Master. So, I reached out via email to each person setting a time to meet and introduce myself. This made it so much easier to connect faces to names and know their personalities. Best thing I did the first week.
Jira was also where I struggled. I thought I could learn it on the job, but it was more challenging than I thought because it was used in the middle of meetings where I had to participate and everything was so fast. I wish I had learned it before my job offer. It was nerve racking to struggle with Jira infront of your audience. My PO had to come to my rescue a few times. Not a good feeling at all. The first 6 weeks were overwhelming. I cried because the expectations were high and I felt like I could not deliver and my confidence was low. Low because I did not know what I was doing. I thought I did because I had the Scrum guide. There is a huge gap BETWEEN THEORY AND PRATICAL. I LEARNED THE HARD WAY THAT THE SCRUM GUIDE AND A 2-DAY COURSE IS NOT ENOUGH TO BE SUCCESSFUL. I am certain that the only reason why my manager had patience with me was because I was a full-time employee. My nights were stressful and I could barely sleep. My lack of confidence kept me awake. I was struggling and needed help. My mentor was out on the country on a family emergency, so I had no one to turn to. Again, it dawned on me that I had missed a lot and needed more coaching. You see this confidence. It is what gives you hope, and helps you succeed. I did not have confidence. None. I could not even pretend. A Scrum Master’s role is a leadership role. A mature role. You have to teach, lead, guide, ask right questions, advocate and promote. How could I promote what I did not grasp. As bad as it was, I was gradually learning. It was slow, but I was picking up a thing or two. I just wished I had prevented the frustration by knowing more.
But picking a thing or two was not enough. Eventually, my senior peers started increasing their demands. They were not wrong, it was expected. I signed up for a job and I knew the longer I stayed on the job, the more the demands would be and their patience would run thin. And it did. I was being sent demanding emails; I was asked tough questions. My mental health was suffering. I was scared to go to work. I decided to take some time off to learn some more. I knew I had to if I wanted to be successful. I took stock of all the areas that I lack confidence. I took two weeks off and connected to a mentor. My new mentor was an older lady who had retired years ago. I have been seeing around on social media but I could not afford her even with my new salary. However, I had to do something different to get me to where I wanted to be. I took my two weeks’ pay, called her up and set a time to connect daily for two weeks. After a few days, I realized that to BE A SCRUM MASTER, YOU HAVE TO BE PATIENT. YOU CANNNOT RUSH THE PROCESS. YOU HAVE TO BE DEDICATED. YOU GET WHAT YOU PUT IN. I returned to work a different person. I did not crawl anymore. I ran and it felt so good.
Check out Part 6